Lets Talk About Weddings -Soberly

Yes I am back! I actually kept away from blogging for more than a week! It was my brother's fault. You see he got married. At a ripe old age of 45 to a bride who is at a tender and ripe age of 21, both are ripe to be married. That's ripe, I mean right. He wanted me to be both the marriage minister and camera man. Now don't you dare snicker. I can be both serious and hilarious ...really! No I am not schizo it's just that when I came out of my mother's womb I was turning blue and the doctor had to whack my behind to make me laugh. That got me breathing. Enough of tall tales. The truth is I was born with extra funny bones but brought up in an ultra conservative church where laughter is scorn upon as 'unspiritual'. I mean who ever heard of 'spiritual laughter'. I recall being with another young church member and as any young teenagers would we enjoyed innocent bantering. We soon felt a chill as we realised a church elder had appeared like a hovering vulture and he gave us a cold disapproving glare. We were told that Christians should be sober and act soberly and verses were quoted as though we had sinned. I mean he was repressive and had a scowl on his face that could sent a bull dog yelping away. Now I have outgrown him and with this blog it's payback time......ha,ha,ha. TAKE THAT YOU BULLDOG! Nowww that is soooo therapeutic.

I hope my 'confessions of a therapist' would help others not to think that they are vulnerable and weak if they laugh or banter. It is the serious scowling man and women who are actually putting on a mask of authority and are afraid that if they remove it, it is tantamount to losing their authority. Do you know anyone like that in your lives? They can be your father, mother, boss, teacher they are everywhere. You can now see them in a new light, not of them as authoritative figures to be afraid off but insecure individuals who are themselves afraid of revealing their own emotions and represses it even the joy in their lives and others. Sad isn't it? In Neuro Linguistic Programming we call this shift in view point as 'reframing'.This is part of therapy techniques we use to help others.

Now back to being a marriage minister for the day. The solemnizing of the vow went well and I got them to kiss. That somehow seems to be the highlight of the ceremony as young girls giggle and a lightning storm of flash lighted up the hall. I could almost hear them thinking aloud, 'Hurry up and finish with it we want action not preaching'. People are certainly strange. On the other hand I think people feel that weddings should be happy and joyous and solemnizing is so contradictory. Now life is like that it is both serious and funny and we can be both.

With Blessings

Isaac Lim

http://www.eftwonder.com/