Even though there are hundreds of emotions and another few hundred more sub emotions. Fear and Love are their commanders. Every other emotion is subservient to these two powerful emotions. Money for example invokes tremendous emotional response. People rob and kill for it, why? Money is about feeling secure. Lost of financial security invokes an acute sense of anxiety and helplessness. This fear of insecurity will drive people to commit acts that go beyond logic as it is an emotional response to fears. The Bible rightly says 'The love for money is the root of all evil" and how accurate it is as it identifies emotions (love as in coveting) as the culprit not money itself which has no emotions in itself.
Everything we do is based on fear and love both emotions are as unpredictable and volatile as the floating continental plates that we stand on. The question we should ask ourselves is which of the two most dominates our thoughts and actions for that would create in our mind the world we live in? Note the question is never, 'Are we emotional' for as Dale Carnegie puts it, "When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion". The real undiluted question is 'Are we controlled by fear or love for that will be our world?'
The fearful person will dominate and control as he is constantly afraid of losing control of his own destiny and environment. He wants to know everything that is going on and is often a perfectionist. He needs order and demands it. He wants others to fear him for he controls them by manipulating their fears. He is often the politician and judge. He is the law and lawmaker yet not under its mandate. He is egoistic and selfish but will give generously to gain control. Yet he has a need to experience love for he keeps everyone at arms length emotionally. His personal space is as big as his fears. He fears exposing his need for love (as any human being needs it to be human). It creates a tension that makes personal relationships a roller coaster.
The loving person is subjected to pleasing others before himself. There is a need to nurture and cultivate relationships so as to foster an exchange of love. He is the philosopher and philanthropist. Happiness is found in bringing joy to others. He is an idealist and often initiates ideas and proposal on the spur of the moment without looking for 'What if's'. He jumps on opportunities and relationships. He is intimate and loves to share his personal space. Socially he is warm and open. All this exposes him to lots of bumps which can slow him down and bring him back to earth. He has fears too and it is in not being able to be who he is and not experiencing love. He needs to express himself and fears being stifled by negativism. He is creative and imaginative. His personal relationships are open and expressive. Unless the partner can keep up with him she will feel drain by his enthusiasm, idealism and need for expressive love.
The world is what it is today because of how we allow these two emotions to dominate and colour our lives.
Do you like the world as it is today? You are responsible for what it has become. To bring changes we need to allow love to turn the world not fear. Fear rules the world today. Peace is now maintained at the barrel of a gun. We believe fear must rule to maintain order. The world has become a fearful world and anxious. If the loving person sounds to you like a myth and unreal then we are really in trouble.
By Isaac Lim
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